The Charade Goes On! - REVIEW THIS STORY

Written by Sascha
Last updated: 01/02/2007 02:01:11 AM

Chapter 1

"What time is it?"

Bobby glanced down at his watch. "Quarter past eleven. Why?"

"An' when's de dinner?"

"Seven."

"Hmm," Remy said. They were sitting in the car - which was still in the parkinglot - and Remy was trying to remember if there was something he had forgotten. He couldn't come up with anything, but that didn't mean that there wasn't some little detail he had overlooked.

"Remy?"

"Huh?"

"Do you still have a headacke?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I was just thinking.. You should take a pill or something."

"I can't."

Bobby looked at him. "Why not?"

"Medication like dat knocks me out," Remy explained absent minded. He was going through a checklist in his head, so he wasn't paying much attention to what Bobby was saying. 'Rings, check. Plausible story, check. Future plans, check. Clothes, check. No, wait a second.' He looked over at Bobby who was dressed in a yellow sweater with a South Park print on and blue jeans. "Where 'zacly are we goin'?"

"Going? Oh. Quake. Why?"

"You need to borrow some clothes," Remy said. "I'm not goin' anywhere in public wit' you dressed de way you usually do."

"Hey, I *like* the way I dress!" Bobby objected.

"I'm sure you do."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Bobby asked suspiciously. "Never mind. I probably don't wanna know," he added a second later.

"Pro'bly not, but I'll tell you anyway." Remy started the car. "Bobby," he said and drove out of the parkinglot. "You are what de womens magazines call a 'fashion disaster'."

Bobby chewed on that for a mile or so. "I'm not," he said finally.

Remy arched his brows.

"Okay, so maybe I am. What's the big deal anyway?" He looked curiously over at Remy. "I mean, you're taking this awfully serious considering it's only a scam."

"You want dis to be de end of all dis, neh?"

"Yeah.. Of course I do."

"Den jus' trust me, okay?"

Bobby was quite for a while. "Okay." There was a strange expression on his face Remy wasn't sure he liked. "Just as long as this gets me away from Milli.."

"It will. If you can play your part, I'll play mine."

"Bobby, I think you're startin' to forget one thing here.." Remy said two hours later when Bobby had tried on, and rejected, almost all the clothes Remy owned.

"What?" Bobby frowned at his reflection in the mirror. He was dressed in black pants, a white shirt and a black west with a discrete silver pattern. Definatly not his usual style. Not Remy's usual style either to tell the truth. Someone must have given him the west for christmas or something.

"I'm helpin' you out here outta de goodness of my heart. Don't make me regret this more dan I already do." Remy sat down on his bed and studied Bobby critically. "Dat's not so bad, by de way. Feels like dere's somethin' missing though."

"Yeah, your looks," Bobby agreed, and then sighed. "Let's face it; we're not going to find anything that doesn't make me look like a hooker, or a twelve year old dressing up for Halloween, or a bad copy of you." He turned around to face him.

Remy stared at him. Then a smile slowly spread on his face and he jumped on his feet again. "Wait here!" he shouted as he ran out of the room, down the stairs and in to the kitchen. He looked around with a wild expression in his eyes. Finally he settled on one of the men present. "Scott!"

Scott froze with the coffeecup half raised up to his mouth. "Huh?"

"I need to borrow dat green jacket of yours. Where is it?"

"In my closet. But what do you.." That was all Remy heard before he was on his way down to the boathouse to grab Scott's green jacket which he had just realised would look prefect on Bobby.

Scott exchanged a confused look with Warren. "What was that all about?"

Warren shrugged. "I have no idea." They went back to reading their newspapers.

Two minutes later.

"Well?" Remy looked at Bobby.

Bobby looked at himself in the mirror. He smiled slowly. "I guess it'll have to do," he said finally. "By the way, isn't this Scott's jacket?"

Remy nodded. "Yeah it is. Now, I was plannin' to catch some sleep before we're goin', so.."

"Okay." Bobby disappeared in to the bathroom, then reappeared carrying the clothes he'd been wearing before. "See you later," he said cheerily before he left the room.

Remy didn't like Milli's brothers. Mainly because they kept staring at him like they were visualizing how he would look choped in to tiny pieces, but also because one of them kept putting his hand on Remy's tigh. He wasn't particulary fond of Bobby at the moment either. He was sitting there, smiling and chatting amiably with Milli. Without even wincing once! And he had only been here for ten minutes. Remy's headacke was returning with full force.

He batted Milli Brother #3's hand away. It wasn't that he couldn't take on Milli's brothers in a fair fight (of course 'fair fight' in Remy's eyes included use of his kinetic power and bo-staff), it was more that he couldn't do it now. And he really wanted to punch that S.O.B. that kept grinning at him like a shark.

Remy glared at Bobby again. Maybe if he kept up with the glaring Bobby would notice and finally realise that the longer they stayed at the resturant, the more in debt he was going to be. By now, Remy estimated his debt to reach over at least three lifetimes.

"..Why settle for a scrawny guy like that when you can have *me*?" Milli Brother #3 asked. For the fourth time or so. "I mean, really, why?"

"He's nicer dan you are," Remy answered, which was true. Normally Bobby was quite nice. Except when he was pissed off at Remy because of Rogue or when he tricked (Remy wasn't sure how, but by now he had decided that Bobby had somehow tricked him in to this) people in to doing completly idiotic things.

"But I can be nice," Milli Brother #3 leered.

Remy sank deeper into the chair he was sitting in. 'This is just perfect. Just perfect!' He was never doing Bobby a favor ever again. 'Hmm.. Maybe I can punch him out later..'

"You really are *lovely* today," Milli told Bobby. "Are you *quite* sure you *don't* want to marry *me*?"

"Well, you know," Bobby said. "I can't."

"Because of *Remy*?" The last word was said with clear distaste.

"Eh.. Yeah. Right, Remy?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Remy replied sourly. That was the n-th time she had said that. He removed Milli Brother #3's hand from his tigh again.

"Wanna dance?" Milli Brother #3 asked with another leer. Milli Brother #1 and #2 glared at him. Milli Brother #4 grinned in a way that told Remy with all possible clearity that he'd just come up with a new way to kill either Remy or Bobby. Remy wasn't quite sure. Milli Brother #4 seemed to dislike both of them.

"Non."

"Oh c'mon! I'm sure *Bobby* won't mind," Milli Brother #3 said. They both looked over at Bobby who turned red.

"Eh..Well. Um. See..Eh..That..eh..um.." Bobby said.

Remy rolled his eyes. "What he's tryin' to say is dat he'll mind. *Right*?"

Bobby nodded. "Right."

'Okay, that's it!' Remy more or less jumped of his chair and stalked out of the resturant, bearly remembering to grab his jacket. Well out on the pavement he started walking, almost hoping - not, scratch 'almost' - that one of the Milli Brothers was coming after him. It didn't necessarily have to be #3, though that would definatly make him feel better. Much better. All he asked for was just one of them to knock out. Was that really too much to ask for? He had after all stayed there for a whole half hour.

"Remy! Hey! Remy! Wait up!" Bobby came running after him. "You were gonna *leave* me in there? What kind of friend are you?" he said accusingly when he came to a halt behind him.

Remy turned around. "Friend? Dat's a new one. And besides you seemed to be enjoyin' yourself."

"Enjoying myself? Have you lost your mind? Oh and I'm sorry about what Chris did.." Remy couldn't believe it was possible to turn as red as Bobby was at this minute. "I mean, really. I didn't.. I mean, if I'd known he was that .. um.. forewards, I'd have traided place with him. No matter how much Milli scares the living hell outta me."

"She scares me too," Remy admitted reluctantly. He suddenly found himself grinning at Bobby. "Let's get de hell outta here before her brothers decide to follow you. Dat is, did dey look like dey were about to follow you?" he asked hopefully. He realised that they should probably be going, but just one punch..

Bobby shook his head. "Nope."

"Merde. Oh well, let's go den."

"I'm with'cha." Bobby flashed him a grin as they started walking towards the car. "And that takes care of the Milli situation, as Scott would say. Or so I hope."

Remy shuddered at the thought of another encounter with Milli - and her brothers. 'It's been kind of fun though. Bobby really is kind of..' He spent the drive back to the mansion telling himself that he was not that far away from turning thirty and that that in itself was bad enough without him getting attracted to guys all of a sudden. Not that he was, mind you. Not at all.