Shadow Man"Hello there, Michael! How's death treatin' ya?"
"Jaunty, kindly refer to me as Shadow Man. Michael LeRoi has no place here in Deadside."
"Whatever, Mick - it's good to see you again. Seems like simply ages since I last set me eyes on your happy, smiling mug."
"The feeling's mutual."
"I suppose you've been away dallying with the old battle-axe. Giving her one with some of that righteous voodoo so's she can stay forever young?"
"Something like that."
"She's been filling your head with her fetid pillow talk again, I'll bet - Doomsdaying and Armagiddying until you're drunk with the stuff."
"She did happen to mention a certain prophetic dream she's been having."
"Did she now? Well, for once I think the old witch might be right. See that bloody big black tower yonder?"
"How could I miss it?"
"Well, old Bruegel, the medieval painter blokie was just telling me the other day that he thought it looked remarkably like a picture he once did."
"Is that Pieter Bruegel?"
"No, Seamus, his distant Irish cousin. Anyways, he was quite shocked, so he was, at the terrible mess the bloody thing's making, appearing out of nowhere and tearing its way through the place like there's no tomorrow. Which, given what Nettie's saying, might not be too far from the truth."
"Any idea what's going on in there?"
"Nope - and I shan't be knocking on the front door to find out, neither. All I'll say is, if there's something wicked heading this way, it'll be coming from in there."
"Nettie mentioned the Dark Souls - can you tell me anymore about them?"
"I'm afraid I'll have to reply in the negative again, Michael. Suffice it to say, Nettie's told me that they're bloody powerful, well nigh indestructible and shouldn't fall into the wrong hands."
"Any idea where they might be?"
"What - am I a Dark Soul travel guide now? I suppose you could try all of the ancient sacred places down among the wailers and shiverers. I just hope that none of them souls have ended up in that filthy big black tower."
"From what Nettie was saying, some of 'em already have - which is all the more reason for me to be pushing on. Open the gates, Jaunty."
"Places to go, people to see, eh, Michael?"
"Just open the gates, Jaunty."
"Did I ever tell you about the time me and Attila The Hun were playing skittles with the guillotined heads of French aristocracy?"
"Jaunty!"
"All right, all right, keep yer bloody hair on - which, looking at your shining bonce, may prove to be rather difficult... Open Sesame! And if you'd be wantin' to pop by and chat awhile, I'll still be here. It's just a shame we can't share a drop of the hard stuff together by a roaring peat fire."
"I don't drink... with snakes..."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B560lCn5kGU